Friday, March 24, 2006

Beyond The Valley of the Blow-Up Dolls

Seed of Chucky
2004, USA
Don Mancini

Let’s deal with the obvious right away: this is not a good movie. But Jennifer Tilly and erections go hand in hand, or more accurately sweaty, twitching hand in tiny, 12 year old girl on the cusp of puberty hand. It’s a fact of life, and it should be mentioned at the beginning of every review of her performance. It doesn’t matter that she looks like a Reubens painting of a prostitute, she still sounds like your date talking dirty at a junior high dance. Of course, the net result of her presence in any film is that all the blood rushes from your head, leaving you much more susceptible to idiocy and illogic that usual, which explains the popularity of Bound.

Hot. That 12 year old girl is in bed with that 12 year old boy.

In Seed of Chucky, Tilly reprises her role as Tiffany, Chucky’s girlfriend from the previous film. The long-running Child’s Play series was thought dead when slasher films passed out of vogue in the mid-nineties, but the post-Scream boom led to a reinvigoration of the genre. 1998’s Bride of Chucky breathed new life into the series by giving Chucky a girlfriend, a distinct visual style courtesy of Asian director Ronnie Yu, and a bunch of labored Frankenstein references. Seed of Chucky continues that theme, patching itself together with twisted versions of other familiar story lines, like the screenwriter is trying to prove working in a video store for four years is a valuable learning experience. As the title would suggest, the star of the film is the progeny of the two dolls, an impossibility explained away rather dismissively by “voodoo”. As far as I know, the only thing voodoo’s good for is Haitian tourism and Anne Rice plot conceits, though if it made dolls speak like Jennifer Tilly I’d be prancing around in a top hat and chicken-bone necklace in no time flat.

The only way to enjoy The Vampire Lestat.

Chucky’s titular seed is nameless, British, and in search of his parents during the film’s very Dickensian first act. Once he discovers that his parents are murderous serial killers toys, the film morphs into a gender-bending riff on Ed Wood’s Glen Or Glenda, and a tongue in cheek story of addiction, as Chucky and Tiffany try to stop killing and become better role models. In fact, tongue-in-cheek is a good way to describe the movie, as it’s humorous, light-hearted, and cartoonishly violent. But, like keeping your tongue in cheek, afterwards all you’re left with is a canker-sore. And once all the blood flows back to your head, that can start to sting.


Anonymous Drek said...

I'll admit, I had to imdb Jennifer Tilly, as I have never watched a chucky movie, or seen many of her others, but I have this to say. All your comments about her are true. I can't believe she is both over twice my age and half chinese. Snap.

1:58 a.m.  
Blogger Jerk Of All Trades 2.0 said...

I loved Jen in "Let It Ride", actually, I loved Jen in that size -3 dress the shoe horned her into.

"You've got great legs."
"Thanks, they go from my ass all the way to the floor."

11:10 a.m.  
Blogger Ash Karreau said...

Drek - I'm glad to have opened your eyes to the wonderful world of legal pedophilia. Watch her films with your eyes closed and you're golden.

Jerk - She's better in The Wrong Guy.

4:21 p.m.  
Blogger batturtle said...

Remember that time you made me watch this movie when I wanted to watch something good like Paris Hilton's 'House of Wax'?

This is why I must destroy you.

5:49 p.m.  
Blogger Ash Karreau said...

No. I don't remember. But thanks for the anthrax letters.

7:35 p.m.  

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